Topic: Most Men are Horn Dawgs

[pandamonium]

Well, all of them. In the op I carved out the big exception as I see it, which is where I fall. Being married and not wanting to be a cheater I wouldn't accept, but I damned well that would without a real reason. Stds apply to everyone, good sex and better sex, accidental pregnancy applies to everyone, and I find slut shaming repugnant.

Yeah, there's nothing actually wrong with being into sexual relationships. I'm not the kind of person that's into that, because I'm lazy mostly. There's this myth of monogamy in our culture that's really damaging, imo. We aren't monogamous - we don't just have one and only one sexual partner in our entire life. God that would be awful.

Someone made a point about serial monogamy being an oxymoron on a podcast I listened to the other day, and I thought they made a good point. Monogamy is defined as only one sexual partner. You can't say that you have one partner, but they're just different people - well, you could, but that's not monogamy. iirc, he made the point that polygyny or polyandry are better terms - multiple sexual partners, just not all at the same time.

[Belgarath]

Okay, I guess I'm not done.  Heh.

Speaking of those OFVCupid dudes, I find it seriously, seriously off-putting when a profile is full of references to sex.  Those guys who list "sex" as one of the six things they can't do without?  I always think, "well, dude, presumably you're doing without it now, so hey."  And I don't want to hear about what a good kisser you are, or what turns you on in a woman, etc., etc.

As panda says, I assume that men think about sex.  I think about sex, too.  That's all groovy.  But when that's the topic that's prominent is this document that presents you to women, I say nix.  I'm going to be very uncomfortable with you, because I'm going to think that all you want to do is bang me. 

Yes, I expect that if/when I meet you, or even when you're looking at my photos, you're gauging my attractiveness, and maybe you're even thinking about having sex with me.  Just don't lead with that card, is all I'm saying.

FTR, I don't think any of the men here behave in such an objectionable fashion.

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

[pandamonium]

Ok SO.  What would make you say no to a woman who tried to pick you up for a ONS?

My wife. But in hypothetical world nothing would. Well, I take that back. If I new the women and didn't like her, but a stranger? Nothing.

So you'd have sex with women you aren't attracted to?

[seaotter]

Standards like what? Do I detect a certain disdain for people who like meaningless sex?

[seaotter]

Ok SO.  What would make you say no to a woman who tried to pick you up for a ONS?

My wife. But in hypothetical world nothing would. Well, I take that back. If I new the women and didn't like her, but a stranger? Nothing.

So you'd have sex with women you aren't attracted to?

I haven't really met many of those.

[David E.]

Ok SO.  Take the situation I mentioned happened to me.  You meet a woman, she is very attractive, very sexy and at the club she is all over you.  You go back to her place and when you walk in there is Dog Shit all over the floor, along with other kinds of mess all over the house, and a really badly trained Dog that will not go away.  Would you stay and have sex with her or leave? 

I left.  I was not risking sleeping with someone who could live in such filth.  Even if I had said to myself fuck it, I don't think I could have performed in that situation.

[AQB24712]

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

Hmm, now I wonder how many women on OFVCupid have sex-focused profiles like those men's profiles I see?  Maybe some of you gents can tell me.  And I wonder what kind of response they get from men.

Standards like what? Do I detect a certain disdain for people who like meaningless sex?

Eh, I dunno if "disdain" is the word.  I can honestly tell you that at one point in my life I really wished I were capable of the casual hookup, but I just couldn't do it.  (That was around the time of one of the resisted opportunities.)  I don't quite understand that mindset, but it is of course none of my business. 

ETA:  David E., eeeeuuuw.

[pandamonium]

Okay, I guess I'm not done.  Heh.

Speaking of those OFVCupid dudes, I find it seriously, seriously off-putting when a profile is full of references to sex.  Those guys who list "sex" as one of the six things they can't do without?  I always think, "well, dude, presumably you're doing without it now, so hey."  And I don't want to hear about what a good kisser you are, or what turns you on in a woman, etc., etc.

As panda says, I assume that men think about sex.  I think about sex, too.  That's all groovy.  But when that's the topic that's prominent is this document that presents you to women, I say nix.  I'm going to be very uncomfortable with you, because I'm going to think that all you want to do is bang me. 

Yes, I expect that if/when I meet you, or even when you're looking at my photos, you're gauging my attractiveness, and maybe you're even thinking about having sex with me.  Just don't lead with that card, is all I'm saying.

FTR, I don't think any of the men here behave in such an objectionable fashion.

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

Ideally, women approaching men for sex shouldn't be any different than men approaching women for sex. But because of how our society differentiates sexual roles between the sexes (men are the aggressors no matter what, women are the passive receivers of male attraction and affection), it is practically different. I would bet that if you polled guys at a bar, the majority would be turned off by women being the one to pursue sex (eg, being the initiator/aggressor in the relationship).

[David E.]

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

Hmm, now I wonder how many women on OFVCupid have sex-focused profiles like those men's profiles I see?  Maybe some of you gents can tell me.  And I wonder what kind of response they get from men.

Standards like what? Do I detect a certain disdain for people who like meaningless sex?

Eh, I dunno if "disdain" is the word.  I can honestly tell you that at one point in my life I really wished I were capable of the casual hookup, but I just couldn't do it.  (That was around the time of one of the resisted opportunities.)  I don't quite understand that mindset, but it is of course none of my business. 

ETA:  David E., eeeeuuuw.

Yeah it was pretty foul.

[pandamonium]

Standards like what?

Well, for one, they shouldn't have BO. Or be a dick. Or be a creationist. Or have STDs. Standards may have been the wrong word. But I need more than a warm hole.

Do I detect a certain disdain for people who like meaningless sex?

No. Was the part where I said "Yeah, there's nothing actually wrong with being into sexual relationships." too subtle for you?

[seaotter]

Ok SO.  Take the situation I mentioned happened to me.  You meet a woman, she is very attractive, very sexy and at the club she is all over you.  You go back to her place and when you walk in there is Dog Shit all over the floor, along with other kinds of mess all over the house, and a really badly trained Dog that will not go away.  Would you stay and have sex with her or leave? 

I left.  I was not risking sleeping with someone who could live in such filth.  Even if I had said to myself fuck it, I don't think I could have performed in that situation.

We all have hangups I suppose but filth is certainly not one of mine, in fact it would probably turn me on. Actually I had a girl friend with bird and a hamster with crap, feathers and wood shavings all over the floor, but she was great in bed, although I could never go to sleep with those fucking hamsters making a fuss all the time.

[David E.]

Okay, I guess I'm not done.  Heh.

Speaking of those OFVCupid dudes, I find it seriously, seriously off-putting when a profile is full of references to sex.  Those guys who list "sex" as one of the six things they can't do without?  I always think, "well, dude, presumably you're doing without it now, so hey."  And I don't want to hear about what a good kisser you are, or what turns you on in a woman, etc., etc.

As panda says, I assume that men think about sex.  I think about sex, too.  That's all groovy.  But when that's the topic that's prominent is this document that presents you to women, I say nix.  I'm going to be very uncomfortable with you, because I'm going to think that all you want to do is bang me. 

Yes, I expect that if/when I meet you, or even when you're looking at my photos, you're gauging my attractiveness, and maybe you're even thinking about having sex with me.  Just don't lead with that card, is all I'm saying.

FTR, I don't think any of the men here behave in such an objectionable fashion.

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

Ideally, women approaching men for sex shouldn't be any different than men approaching women for sex. But because of how our society differentiates sexual roles between the sexes (men are the aggressors no matter what, women are the passive receivers of male attraction and affection), it is practically different. I would bet that if you polled guys at a bar, the majority would be turned off by women being the one to pursue sex (eg, being the initiator/aggressor in the relationship).

Many men don't know how to even handle a woman who is sexually aggressive.  It's like the old cat calling at woman on the street.  Most men would run like a nose slapped dog if the woman turned around, sauntered back and said: "Show me what you got."

[pandamonium]

What I've learned from this thread: seaotter is a horn dog.

[pandamonium]

Many men don't know how to even handle a woman who is sexually aggressive.  It's like the old cat calling at woman on the street.  Most men would run like a nose slapped dog if the woman turned around, sauntered back and said: "Show me what you got."

What if she said, "No thanks, I got a bigger one from Amazon"?

[seaotter]

Okay, I guess I'm not done.  Heh.

Speaking of those OFVCupid dudes, I find it seriously, seriously off-putting when a profile is full of references to sex.  Those guys who list "sex" as one of the six things they can't do without?  I always think, "well, dude, presumably you're doing without it now, so hey."  And I don't want to hear about what a good kisser you are, or what turns you on in a woman, etc., etc.

As panda says, I assume that men think about sex.  I think about sex, too.  That's all groovy.  But when that's the topic that's prominent is this document that presents you to women, I say nix.  I'm going to be very uncomfortable with you, because I'm going to think that all you want to do is bang me. 

Yes, I expect that if/when I meet you, or even when you're looking at my photos, you're gauging my attractiveness, and maybe you're even thinking about having sex with me.  Just don't lead with that card, is all I'm saying.

FTR, I don't think any of the men here behave in such an objectionable fashion.

I think that he's trying to make the point that the reverse isn't true, but I am not sure. (i.e. a woman approaching a man and asking for sex is different than a man approaching a woman and asking for sex)

Ideally, women approaching men for sex shouldn't be any different than men approaching women for sex. But because of how our society differentiates sexual roles between the sexes (men are the aggressors no matter what, women are the passive receivers of male attraction and affection), it is practically different. I would bet that if you polled guys at a bar, the majority would be turned off by women being the one to pursue sex (eg, being the initiator/aggressor in the relationship).

Well, I'm not letting bullshit machismo keep me from having fun!