Topic: Reading from the bible tommorrow

[D'oh!]

I'd want a fog machine and laser lights at dawn. 

Cool!  I want a Viking-like affair -- or at least a pyre.  And nobody gets to wear black but me.

[TalkingBook]

I wonder how absurd you could make your final wishes and still have them followed. "Everybody is to meet at Chuck'E'Cheese's at dawn wearing pink Spandex leotards and playing 'Sweet Child of Mine' on kazoos and finger cymbals..."

[Zytheran]

One thing to bear in mind is that the Bible is book written by people, not divine spirits etc. Not all of it is crap and many of the positive lessons in it would have come from the mouths of any decent person regardless of their religion. So if the verses are not overly god focussed the ideas probably wouldn't look out of place in a humanist book. And the reading is for the benefit of the living not the dead, will it make you feel good to make the living happy, regardless of what you think of them? Probably, then do it.

(Anyway back to getting the photos together and writing the eulogy for my dads funeral this week...and getting the MP3 of that hymn he evidently liked (he was totally non-religous but his sister and mum insist he liked it  ), luckily Elvis did a version so that's some small grace)

[AQB24712]

2) There's a bit of an implication that the only way 341gerbig can eulogize his grandfather is by reading these verses.  Wouldn't it be more meaningful if he said something from his own heart?  If those verses are particularly meaningful, I'm sure someone else can read it.  Most of the things I remember most from funerals are stories and anecdotes from the person's lives, not the rote recitation of religious texts.

I see no such implication, because 341gerbig wrote and will deliver a eulogy, from his own heart.  Also, he's told us that the reading of the verses fell to him because the family members who chose them are incapable of delivering them (debilitating stage fright, he said).  It would be cruel to try to force these family members to read in public at this event.

Moving back out of abstraction, however, my initial point remains.  I'm sorry for your loss and ultimately, you should do what you think is best.  Funeral and the like are not rational events where everything has to be logical or rationally thought out - they are emotional events for the people who are still alive.  I hope it all goes well.

On this we are in total agreement.

One thing to bear in mind is that the Bible is book written by people, not divine spirits etc. Not all of it is crap and many of the positive lessons in it would have come from the mouths of any decent person regardless of their religion. So if the verses are not overly god focussed the ideas probably wouldn't look out of place in a humanist book. And the reading is for the benefit of the living not the dead, will it make you feel good to make the living happy, regardless of what you think of them? Probably, then do it.

(Anyway back to getting the photos together and writing the eulogy for my dads funeral this week...and getting the MP3 of that hymn he evidently liked (he was totally non-religous but his sister and mum insist he liked it  ), luckily Elvis did a version so that's some small grace)

Very wise, Zytheran, and I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your dad.  Kudos for finding the Elvis loophole.

[Rabbit]

(click to show/hide)

Yea, so my grandpas funeral is tomorrow, and since im the only member of my family that doesn't suffer from debilitating stage fright, I
was asked to read 3 bible passages along with the eulogy, an im not sure how I feel about it. On one hand, I am helping my family with the grieving process, and I am really the only one who can actually get up in front of hundreds of people without having a breakdown.

on the other hand, my family knows I am an atheist, I make no effort to hide it on my facebook page, and I don't attend family church events when they happen, yet they asked me to do it. It feels like a lack of respect for my faith (I feel guilty for being selfish about worrying about respect)

I really dont know what I am asking, Just looking for perspective/looking to talk my feelings out.


Has anyone else been put in a similar situation?

I was asked to do the same thing at my grandmother's funeral a number of years back. I refused. I even refused to enter the church.

There were other ways to mourn and remember my grandmother that included my family. Refusing to do it put me in the dog house for a while with some members of my family, but I still think I did the right thing. My grandmother understood my feelings on the matter, (she didn't agree with them), and I had made them clear to her before she died. It benefitted her in no way after she died whether I was in that church or not. I was there for my family when it mattered, but under no circumstances would I stain the memory of the lively discussions we had on religion/faith/etc. by particapating in that mummer's show.

I should probably add an addendum that Irish catholic funerals are all about the church and very little to do with the family or deceased. You don't to get to decide if you want to read from a book, it's the bible only and you don't get to choose the music played if it is deemed inappropriate, no matter how much the deceased loved it. My grandmother loved Pavarotti but we were told it was inappropriate in the church because his music was "too popular".

[MikeHz]

just as a joke, I think that I'll request that my wife's stuffy fundy sister read the following Bible passages at my funeral, having to do with boobs:

Proverbs 5:18-19 "Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love."

Song of Songs 1:13 "A bundle of myrrh is my well-beloved unto me; he shall lie all night betwixt my breasts."

Song of Songs 7:7-8 "This thy physique is like to a palm tree, and thy breasts to clusters of grapes. I said, I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of the boughs thereof: now also thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine, and the smell of thy nose like apples."

[341gerbig]

Here is my Grandpa:


Reading went well, my one grandma(not the one in the pic, who is aware of my atheism) came up and said "I know that was out of your comfort zone, but im sure your grandpa would have created it.

Being a farmer his whole life, they put his ashes is a hollow wooden carved combine. It was touching and perfect.

I wasnt nervous, and the verses my family choose were more about celebrating his life than about god and jebuz.

The pastor went on a long diatrab THAT MADE ME ANGRY though, he implied that grandpa may be in hell by saying "lets hope he got a chance to repent before he passed on, so that he did indeed make it to heaven and not the other direction"(Good thing to say at a funeral dip$hit......keep that in your head) he then went on  to have a long winded speech about how you can die at any time, so you better be repenting constantly or you will go to hell

Everything else was nice. A positive experience

[D'oh!]

Good for you!  And sorry for your loss.





Oh, and that pastor's an a$$hole.

[Karyn]

Good for you!  And sorry for your loss.





Oh, and that pastor's an a$$hole.

QFT.

[nsfwjonathan]

I'd look at it this way:

Arthur C. Clarke requested no religious reference at all in his funeral/memorial and from all I know that was respected - that doesn't mean dear friends of believing ilks couldn't speak kindly of him at this time, all while still respecting Clarke's beliefs.  I would argue that it would be a bad humanist to refuse a grieving family comfort that you can easily provide, and isn't humanism where new atheism is headed anyway?

[Plastique]

The pastor went on a long diatrab THAT MADE ME ANGRY though, he implied that grandpa may be in hell by saying "lets hope he got a chance to repent before he passed on, so that he did indeed make it to heaven and not the other direction"

Fuck.

[nsfwjonathan]

The pastor went on a long diatrab THAT MADE ME ANGRY though, he implied that grandpa may be in hell by saying "lets hope he got a chance to repent before he passed on, so that he did indeed make it to heaven and not the other direction"

Fuck.

I second this.