Author Topic: Funny SPAM Email  (Read 9469 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Jay

  • SGU Panel Member
  • Keeps Priorities Straight
  • *****
  • Posts: 438
Funny SPAM Email
« on: May 12, 2007, 05:01:38 PM »
Here is an email I received from some scammer today and my response is below:

Dear sir,

Permit me to inform you of going into a business transaction with you. I am the Son of late chief  fedrick kamara from Liberia my late father was an international businessman and a cocoa marchant my father was killed by rebels on September 19 2006 and as his only child they are also seeking to kill me too.

Before the death of my Father he deposited 10.5 million USD dollars in a suspense account in a bank in Abidjan and told me to seek for a forigen partner that will provide account overseas where the funds will be transfered to for Investment.

Please I am asking you to assist me so that this funds can be transfered to your account for Investment.Every documents about the funds is legal.

God bless you.
JUDE KAMARA.

---------------------------------------------------------------
My reply:

Jude,

    I am sorry to hear about the untimely death of your father.  My supreme condolences to you and your family.  It was fortunate that you found me and had the nerve to ask for my help.  I own an international software company that deals with high level government security.  We not only create software to protect governments from internet based threats, we also provide physical security using the latest technology and experienced personal.  

   I have spoken to my VP of operations and we quickly concluded that you are indeed in serious danger.  We advise the following plan of action.   Send me your bank name, address and account #.  I will create a joint account with my company name and yours.  At that point I will contact my bank who will interface with yours, facilitating the transaction.  Do this as soon as possible being that I am leaving the country next week on pressing business with foreign nationals in Europe. Meanwhile I will deploy a team to extricate you from Liberia and bring you safely to Sierra Leone.  You must provide me a meeting point so my team can collect you.  Once I am done, it should take 24 hours, I would be happy to rendezvous with you, I crave our meeting.  I have political influence and can get you out of the country and into the US without trouble and with total anonymity.

 From there we can safely discuss our mutual investments with the 10.5 million US dollars.

Regards,

Mr. Jaymeson Stoll


------------------------------------------------------------------
If I get the money the quality of the podcast will explode!
I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it. - Ford Prefect  "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

Offline Chris Lamb

  • Seasoned Contributor
  • ****
  • Posts: 899
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2007, 05:36:30 PM »
Nice one.  :lol:
img]http://img183.imageshack.us/img183/4591/darwinsig2pl8.jpg[/img]

Offline chionactis

  • moonlit leaves rustling, empty parking lot, tiny astronaut above the mountainside
  • Frequent Poster
  • ******
  • Posts: 2290
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2007, 09:11:36 PM »
I received a similar email this morning:

EDIT: I decided to delete the email message.  It's basically someone saying they are deathly ill and they need to send me a lot of money.

I receive quite a few emails like this, as probably most of us do, and I've often considered sending a reply similar to the one you posted, but I worry that it will just increase the amount of spam I get.

Anyway, I'd be interested in knowing if they respond.
"Sometimes I think it's all one big affectation. The forty jars, each holding its thief, draw closer to me, trying to eavesdrop." John Ashbery

"And beware the casual assumption of moral superiority, or that everyone who disagrees with you is evil. That is the path to fanaticism." Dr. Steven Novella

Offline CleveDan

  • Seasoned Contributor
  • ****
  • Posts: 782
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2007, 11:52:03 PM »
i would definitely use a yahoo or hotmail to respond to the
"The argument is absurd almost beyond description – but not quite, so I will describe the absurdity" --Dr. Steve Novella
"I was a little confused as to why it was relevant for Miller to give us all a lesson in evolutionary biology" --Casey Luskin.....An AssHat of some note

Offline chionactis

  • moonlit leaves rustling, empty parking lot, tiny astronaut above the mountainside
  • Frequent Poster
  • ******
  • Posts: 2290
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #4 on: May 13, 2007, 01:10:44 AM »
I found an interesting example of someone leading one of these scammers on at The Spam Report.

Why do you recommend yahoo or hotmail, CleveDan?
"Sometimes I think it's all one big affectation. The forty jars, each holding its thief, draw closer to me, trying to eavesdrop." John Ashbery

"And beware the casual assumption of moral superiority, or that everyone who disagrees with you is evil. That is the path to fanaticism." Dr. Steven Novella

Offline Leonidas

  • Off to a Start
  • *
  • Posts: 39
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #5 on: May 13, 2007, 09:14:43 AM »
i never get this kind of email  :cry:
he ideal (it's nice)

Offline Orthodox Infidel

  • Well Established
  • *****
  • Posts: 1334
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #6 on: May 13, 2007, 11:06:39 AM »
Quote from: "CleveDan"
i would definitely use a yahoo or hotmail to respond to them


Gmail is best for this sort of thing. Don't use hotmail or yahoo; they give out your IP in the headers, which can be a problem if 1) a reverse lookup on your IP gives out information as to where you live, or 2) you lie about where you are geographically in your emails.

I used to do quite a bit of scambaiting. If you want to learn more about it, you may want to look here: www.419eater.com

Offline Grohl

  • Brand New
  • Posts: 2
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #7 on: May 13, 2007, 04:55:48 PM »
Quote from: "Leonidas"
i never get this kind of email  :cry:

You can always create one yourself.  :wink:
http://www.egowar.com/nigerian_scam_letter_generator.htm

Remember one website where a guy managed to get the scammer to post a picture of himself holding a sign that read "I take it up the arse". Definitely made my day.  :D
quot;Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
- Albert Einstein

Offline SkepThickHeaded

  • Stopped Going Outside
  • *******
  • Posts: 4604
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #8 on: May 15, 2007, 07:30:20 PM »
Quote from: "Grohl"
Quote from: "Leonidas"
i never get this kind of email  :cry:

You can always create one yourself.  :wink:
http://www.egowar.com/nigerian_scam_letter_generator.htm

Remember one website where a guy managed to get the scammer to post a picture of himself holding a sign that read "I take it up the arse". Definitely made my day.  :D


http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/ is a great website for Nigerian Letter scam baiting.  Loads of funny reading.
"When push comes to shove, you've got to do what you love...even if it's not a good idea"  Hermes Conrad

Offline heliocentricra

  • Frequent Poster
  • ******
  • Posts: 3772
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #9 on: May 17, 2007, 05:43:55 PM »
My brother put his car up for sale on Craigslist and got an offer from some scammer in Nigeria. He wrote to the guy saying:

"Thank you for your offer. In my original post I neglected to mention that I will need the payment delivered in $5 bills, each one individually wrapped in tin foil."

The guy didn't write back.

Offline Dave The Drummer

  • Seasoned Contributor
  • ****
  • Posts: 881
  • The Antithesis
    • Dave The Drummer
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #10 on: May 18, 2007, 07:53:48 PM »
:lol:  :lol:
Reaching out to embrace the random, reaching out to embrace whatever may come.

Offline Mark7300

  • The Happy Bunny
  • Frequent Poster
  • ******
  • Posts: 3930
  • Other people are the problem.
Tractors.
« Reply #11 on: May 29, 2007, 05:28:09 AM »
My spam is all about lawn tractors... I never even get any porn spam. It's sad really. I live in an appartment...

"Congratulations Dear Subscriber!

FreeLawnTractor is giving away brand-new Lawn Mowers and you have been selected to receive a powerful 2007 Lawn Tractor of your choice! (Participation required.
See below for details.)

 -- Craftsman, Cub Cadet or John Deere
 -- 42" Deck size
 -- 17.5-18.5 HP Engine
 -- $1,600-$1,800

Confirm your email address and follow our simple website instructions to reserve yours!
http://paperclipjester.com/c/893370/opysyyzuz:fzomttrsqTCKaprruzvv1ZCKastutv7


Sincerely,
The FreeLawnTractor Team"
I'm a Pareidoliaologist.

Offline mickal777

  • Beleth Gave Me 100 Gold
  • Stopped Going Outside
  • *******
  • Posts: 4164
    • Trip to Japan
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #12 on: May 29, 2007, 07:46:44 AM »
I reakon you should remove the URL..

Offline LaPalida

  • Frequent Poster
  • ******
  • Posts: 3689
  • To thy own self be true.
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #13 on: June 22, 2007, 01:59:13 PM »
My spam is ALL about dirty porn and penis enlargements.
"First get your facts; then you can distort them at your leisure."
- Mark Twain

Offline Joe Shmoe

  • Chief Rape Apologist
  • Stopped Going Outside
  • *******
  • Posts: 5347
Funny SPAM Email
« Reply #14 on: June 22, 2007, 03:23:54 PM »
Quote from: "LaPalida"
My spam is ALL about dirty porn and penis enlargements.


That makes sense, your penis is tiny.  I seen it!

 

personate-rain