STEVE: “How should I act during the interview [with a sexy publication]? Should I be really cool?”
ME: “Steve . . . no. Just . . . no.”
STEVE: “So what, I should just my own lovable self?”
ME: “Yes Steve. Please don’t try to act cool. That will be a disaster.”
STEVE: “I can act. I’m a great actor.”
ME: “Just because your LARPing friends told you you’re great as both a pirate wench and a zombie killer dwarf does NOT mean you can act cool during an interview.”
BOB: “I just found a website called Sophisticunts!”